I’m going to quit trying to find “Balance”

Try to exercise, finish that big project, eat healthy, make all your food, eat organic/humane/only the low mercury happy plentiful fish, play with your kids, teach your kids, spend time with your friends, family and spouse, make a date night, have sex with your spouse, spend time alone, be spiritual, be sincere, get 8.75 hours of sleep, be creative, do something fun, earn enough money, don’t spend to much, don’t be a Scrooge with your money. They are all good things and all things I do occasionally, but I’ve decided to stop feeling guilty when one upstages the other because it’s been neglected so long. Maybe when I was younger the balance thing was doable. Now it’s not feasible and I’ve decided I’m going to be OK with it. I’m going to let the house become ridiculously dirty while I focus on getting some beans and corn planted. I’m going to get less sleep while spend a little time with myself. My spiritual time is not going to look like my husband’s or my neighbor’s because they don’t have my job, my cares, or my desires.

It’s more fun to really get into something, to dedicate yourself to it, to really enjoy it. For that to happen other things will slip, and that’s ok. I’m going to plan what I want my day, week, month, and year to look like and I’m going to readjust monthly. I’m going to pursue and peruse my passions, my desires, and my obligations with the ebb and flow that my life allows. Just like my kid’s ages determine how we do somethings, so my age, desire, money, and time will determine the rhythm of life. I’m giving up on feeling guilty for that.